Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Peaks and Valleys

Well, it's been an interesting couple of days. I have seen some major highs and major lows since I posted my poem yesterday.

I'll start with the low, and get that right out of the way because I'd rather have something sweet to calm my mood at the end. First; Dustin's job search isn't going very well. I wish it was going better but the economy, especially in Janesville, is just awful. There are no jobs. What can you do? Second, while it wasn't a new discovery per se, I discovered that a relative of mine stole something from me.

If I go back and start at the beginning, this person has stolen from me since they were really young. It started out as anything shiny. Like a little raccoon, they would secret my items away just because it looked sparkly in some way or another. The funny thing was that the person would hide them in the same spot every time, so I would just take it back, scold them, and move on. Nothing more was ever said or done about it because it was made out by another family member as "not a big deal"... so I left it be. When this person reached their teen, it started to become more expensive items, or items associated with my religion. This person (I thought) looked up to me in one way or another, religiously and otherwise, so I explained as they aged that that was just not acceptable. It is not right to steal and it is even more wrong to steal religious items. It's the exact opposite of what my religion stands for... I also explained that somehow, the items I care about always find their way back to me.

A good example of this; when said person was in middle school, I was at the middle school for a visit and sat with them at their lunch table. A friend of theirs came to sit with us and when she sat down, I saw a necklace (sterling silver and amethyst, and very expensive necklace) draped around this girl's neck that was exactly like a necklace that an ex-boyfriend bought for me in Madison... I asked her where she got it, and she told me. I was floored. I had no idea that this relative of mine was still stealing from me. The girl gave me back the necklace and then I spent some time after questioning this relative about what else they had stolen from me. This came at a bad time for them, because I had been missing my engagement ring for a few weeks at this point. I found out for sure that a friend of theirs had stolen it from my house when they were babysitting my daughter. Ugh.

Just when I think I can trust this person, some other skeleton comes falling out of the closet, bones rattling and bleached white for all to see. So, as for this recent item, I had a friend of theirs send me a picture of herself that I was going to work on in Photoshop... what do I see but my necklace hanging from her neck. The worst part was how awful she felt about it when I told her where it had actually come from. I don't blame her. How was she to know? But, like all things I truly care for when it comes to possessions, the necklace found it's way back to me once again.

The person in question is over the age of eighteen. I let them have it for a good two hours over the phone, I told them how hurt I was, how I didn't understand why someone would take from someone that they were A) related to, and B) from someone who really has so little. That stealing is wrong to begin with was beside the point. That they are family and stealing from me is so much worse, in my book. So now we are back to square one again, they have told me all that they have stolen over the years that never returned (totaling something like 2-300 dollars worth of items), and I have to learn to trust them. Should I have called the police? Probably. That is something I'll just have to learn to deal with.

So. I have been feeling lousy all day. The necklace was returned today, it now rests around my neck and that feels a bit better... but it didn't lift my mood. Until the good came along. The really good.

I'm minding my own business, sitting on the couch wondering what I am going to make the family for dinner, how much work that's going to be, feeling generally ill-at-ease, when a knock sounds at my door. My neighbor is standing on my porch with a pan full of uncooked lasagna. "Set the oven to 350* and cook it for thirty minutes", he says and walks back down the sidewalk, smiling.

I don't know how he knew my day had been crappy, but it was nice to know that someone, somewhere, was sending some good vibes my way.

My love to you all,

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